Release, Reset, Refocus: A Simple 3-Step Exercise to Let Go of Stress

Sometimes we finish work, a difficult conversation or a stressful day, but our mind doesn’t get the message that it’s time to move on.

You might arrive home still thinking about what happened at work. You might be replaying a conversation, worrying about tomorrow, feeling irritated for no obvious reason, or simply carrying a long list of things you haven’t finished.

When this happens, it can be difficult to properly switch off and be present for whatever comes next.

The Release, Reset, Refocus exercise is a simple three-step activity designed to help you create a deliberate pause between one part of your day and the next.

It involves releasing what’s taking up mental space, grounding yourself in the present moment, and setting intentions for what comes next.

You can use it after work, before bed, after a difficult interaction, when you’re feeling overwhelmed or whenever you feel like you need a mental reset.

 

Step 1: Release – Get It Out of Your Head

Start by taking a piece of paper and writing down everything that you’re still carrying.

Don’t worry about making it neat, structured or even logical. This isn’t about writing a journal entry or finding solutions. It’s simply an opportunity to put your thoughts and emotions somewhere outside of your head.

You might write down:

• Frustrations from the day
• Things that have annoyed you
• Worries or anxious thoughts
• Unfinished tasks
• Things you need to remember
• Difficult conversations
• Emotions you’re experiencing
• Things you’re replaying in your mind
• Reflections about your day
• Anything else that feels like it’s taking up mental space

Keep writing until you’ve emptied out as much as you need to.

Then, when you’re ready, rip the paper into tiny pieces and put it in the bin.

The purpose isn’t to magically make your problems disappear. Instead, this physical action can provide a tangible way of marking the end of the exercise and creating a sense of separation from what you’ve been carrying.

You have acknowledged it. You’ve put it somewhere. Now you can begin to shift your attention towards what comes next.

Step 2: Reset – Reconnect With Your Body

Once you’ve finished writing, take a few minutes to slow down and reconnect with your body.

When we’re stressed or overwhelmed, our attention can become caught up in thoughts about what has happened or what might happen next. Grounding can help bring your attention back to the present moment.

Choose a grounding exercise that works for you.

Try some slow breathing

Take a slow breath in and allow your exhale to be slightly longer.

You don’t need to force your breathing or take particularly deep breaths. Instead, focus on breathing slowly and comfortably while noticing the sensation of your breath moving in and out.

Try Progressive Muscle Relaxation

Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR) is another simple way to reconnect with your body. It involves gently tensing and then relaxing different muscle groups, helping you notice the difference between tension and relaxation.

Find a comfortable position and work through different areas of your body, such as your hands, shoulders, jaw, stomach and legs. Gently tense each area for a few seconds before releasing and noticing the sensation of relaxation.

You don’t need to tense your muscles forcefully. Keep it comfortable and avoid any movement that causes pain or discomfort.

For a more detailed guide, read our article on Progressive Muscle Relaxation for anxiety and stress.

 

Use your senses

Take a moment to notice what is around you.

What can you see?
What can you hear?
What can you feel?
What can you smell?

You can also simply notice your feet on the floor, the chair supporting you or the sensation of your clothing against your skin.

The goal isn’t to force yourself to feel completely calm. Instead, you’re giving yourself an opportunity to slow down, reconnect with your body and bring your attention back to the present moment.

Step 3: Refocus – Set Your Intentions

Now that you’ve released what you were carrying and taken some time to ground yourself, ask:

“How do I want to approach the next part of my day?”

This is where you shift your attention from what has already happened to what you want to focus on next.

Write down a few simple intentions.

For example:

I want to be present with my family tonight.

I want to leave work at work.

I want to give myself permission to rest.

Tomorrow, I will take things one step at a time.

I want to respond rather than react.

Tonight, I want to focus on getting a good night’s sleep.

I will be patient with myself tomorrow.

Your intentions don’t need to be big or profound. They can be simple reminders of how you want to show up during the next part of your day.

When Can You Use the Release, Reset, Refocus Exercise?

One of the benefits of this exercise is that you can adapt it to different situations.

After work

Use it as a transition between work and home life.

Instead of taking the frustrations and pressures of your workday through the front door, create a few minutes to acknowledge what happened, ground yourself and consciously transition into your personal time.

Before bed

If your mind tends to become busy when you get into bed, try the exercise earlier in your evening.

Write down the thoughts, tasks and worries that are still taking up space in your mind. Ground yourself and then set a few intentions for tomorrow.

You may find that this creates a clearer mental boundary between today and tomorrow.

When you’re feeling irritable

Sometimes irritability is a sign that you’re carrying more than you realise.

Rather than immediately reacting to the people around you, consider taking a short pause.

Write down what’s going on, ground yourself and then decide how you want to respond.

Before a stressful day

You can also use the exercise the night before something you know may be challenging.

Writing down your concerns can help you acknowledge what’s on your mind, while setting intentions can give you something constructive to focus on when the stressful situation arrives.

After a difficult interaction

If you’ve had an argument, challenging conversation or uncomfortable interaction, you may find yourself replaying it afterwards.

The exercise gives you an opportunity to acknowledge what you’re feeling without continuing to carry the interaction with you throughout the rest of your day.

You Don’t Have to Carry Everything With You

Moving from one part of your day to another doesn’t always happen automatically.

Sometimes we need to create the transition ourselves.

The Release, Reset, Refocus exercise provides a simple way to pause and acknowledge what you’re carrying, reconnect with your body and intentionally decide what you want to focus on next.

You don’t need to do it perfectly, and you don’t need to spend a long time doing it.

Sometimes a few minutes can be enough to create some space between what has happened, what you’re feeling now and what comes next.

If you find that stress, anxiety, irritability or overwhelming thoughts are becoming difficult to manage, speaking with a counsellor can provide an opportunity to explore what’s contributing to these experiences and develop strategies that work for you.

Need Some Support?

You don’t have to manage everything on your own. Counselling can provide a confidential, judgement-free space to talk through what’s happening, understand your experiences and develop practical strategies to manage stress, anxiety and emotional overwhelm.

At Meta Minds Therapy, we provide counselling in a supportive and collaborative environment, with online and in-person appointments available.

If you’re ready to talk, get in touch with Meta Minds Therapy or book a counselling appointment today.

Pause. Release. Reset. Refocus.